"Having butterflies in your stomach" – a feeling that every lover knows. Sometimes they start to flutter at the mere thought of the beloved person, and seem to flutter when the other person finally confronts you. The perfect time for a Love confession?
The origin of this feeling is interesting: the uncertainty about whether the other person will continue to reciprocate one’s own feelings. At the beginning of a relationship, this circumstance is by no means clarified; there is always the risk of parting ways again. So it’s hard to imagine that it’s precisely this circumstance that causes the wonderful tingling in my stomach.
From butterflies to stones
Especially since, under other circumstances, it can be precisely this insecurity that drives one sheer mad – the supposed butterflies then lie like stones on one’s heart. This is how it inevitably feels when a love is (still) unfulfilled because the beloved person doesn’t know about your own feelings for him or her. So every thought, every meeting and every farewell is shrouded in an ambivalent aura. This unpleasant insecurity can only be transformed into a positive circumstance if all courage is mustered and the affection shown to the other person is confessed.
Situations that require a confession of love
Ideally, a confession in the classical sense is superfluous. At best, two people get to know each other, are attracted to each other, meet frequently, and at some point, quite naturally and almost of their own accord, find each other and become a couple. But this self-evidence is not always given. Some situations are conceivable in which this "naturalness of love" can be inhibited. For example, when the person you love…
- a work colleague or even a superior,
- a good friend or
- is already in a relationship.
In such cases, love (even mutual) can certainly develop, but the environment or the current relationship constellation impairs the natural flow, so that a declaration of love becomes necessary to bring clarity into the situation.
Mentally anticipating the declaration of love
However, this is often delayed, because the reaction of the other person can not always be clearly estimated. Mentally, all possible answers of the beloved person are anticipated in advance; as well as the consequences that a confession could result in:
- "Will we still be able to work together efficiently?"
- "Am I destroying our friendship with it?"
- "Don’t I complicate the situation even more??"
Such and similar questions run through the mind in the run-up to a love confession and additionally hit the mind. Not enough that the love is unrequited (so far); possible consequences intimidate and raise doubts whether revealing one’s feelings would be a good decision.
When is a confession of love useful?
However, as a rule, such and similar doubts are well-founded and protect against disappointment. Most of us have a well-developed intuitive psychology. D. h., good knowledge of human nature in terms of how we evaluate the behavior of others towards us and what conclusions we can draw from this.
Therefore, it should not always be interpreted exclusively as a lack of courage, if one does not succeed over a longer period of time to confess his love to the other one. Under certain circumstances, it is our subconscious that inhibits this act, because we secretly suspect that this would not have the hoped-for effect.
Therefore, the following applies: be honest with yourself!
Is there a possibility that a confession of love will bring the relationship to a new level, or can at least personal profit be made from the revelation of feelings (even if the person does not reciprocate the feelings)??
In so far as neither one nor the other is true, confession should be refrained from. Otherwise, the resulting damage may simply be too great. In such a case, it would be better to keep a distance both mentally and physically, in order to give the butterflies in your stomach the opportunity to fly for a person who is similarly devoted to you.
Waiting for the right moment
However, if it is to be expected that one’s feelings could be reciprocated or a declaration of love is inevitable, since otherwise one’s life would threaten to stagnate, all courage should be mustered to inform the other person of one’s affections. It is difficult to give advice that is valid for everyone regarding the "perfect moment.
Love confession – The right moment
It comes v. a. It is important that the situation is authentic, that it is undisturbed and that it fits the people involved and their previous relationship. Inasmuch as this would not be the case, both of them would feel uncomfortable, which would be in keeping with the Confession of love Getting in the way. Furthermore, it would be advantageous if the situation leaves open possibilities for "escape".
Confessing love during a weekend getaway may be romantic, but it can quickly turn into a horror trip if the conversation does not turn out as positively as hoped. In general, it is advisable not to plan too meticulously when, where and how such a conversation should take place, as this could result in some problems:
- The slightest deviation is unsettling and upsets you.
- The confession seems artificial and memorized, but should seem genuine and come from the heart.
- Expectations that are too high can lead to disappointment or put the other person under pressure.
- The other person may be in a bad mood, sick or otherwise stressed at the scheduled time.
Therefore, it is better to be spontaneous and let the moment come to you. At some point, a situation will come that will literally cry out for a confession. Of course, such flexibility makes it impossible to stage brilliant performances – but this should not be necessary at all.
How can love be expressed in words?
Finally, such a proof of love should not be about demonstrating one’s organizational skills, creativity or possibilities – it should be solely about convincing the other person of one’s love; and this usually does not require any grand gestures. Rather, the focus should be on what really counts: the feelings for the other person.
To this end, it is important to be honest. If the decision has been made to confess one’s affection, this should not be done half-heartedly. It is about expressing what is felt for the other person in his or her own words. Stylistically confident expression or creative choice of words are largely unimportant; significant, however, is the content and how it is conveyed to the other:
- What moment has brought the certainty that it must be love?
- What is special about the other person?
- Why is the time spent together so valuable?
- In what way does the other person enrich one’s life??
To be declared love in a credible way is something wonderful, which, if the other person feels the same way about you, should be proof of love enough. Even if Hollywood often sets other standards: reality doesn’t work that way! In addition, the inhibition threshold to reveal one’s feelings to the beloved person decreases if no great effort is required in advance and no more pressure is placed on one.
Moreover, without meticulous planning, flexibility and spontaneity are preserved, so that love can be confessed when the time seems appropriate. At best, one’s own feelings are returned and the common future begins. In this case, during the course of the relationship, there will be plenty of opportunities to prove your love with numerous (and creative and cheesy) love tokens. Love lives on this for a long time – in the beginning, however, the work can be confidently left to the butterflies..