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News from Speaker& Motivational trainer Steffen Kirchner

Steffen Kirchner Blog

Steffen kirchner blog

One of the most frequent questions I was asked in the past years was: Steffen, how do I actually find my purpose? There are several answers to this question, because there are different methods how to find your purpose. Today I would like to show you times a completely creative method, with which you can recognize and find your determination actually in a completely different way. I am sure this approach will change your perspective and give you a new outlook on yourself and your life. Let’s dive into this topic together. Let’s go!

The issue of determination is something that drives us humans throughout our lives. I believe that people can only be really happy and fulfilled or feel that way if they have an idea of their purpose.

What does the word purpose even mean and is it the same as vocation or meaning in life?
I think it is important not to get lost in such formulations, because we are all talking about more or less the same thing. It is about the question, what gives you meaning and fulfillment in your life?. What do you want to make an impact in the world and pass on? These are the central questions. When people have found something they are passionate about, have a talent for, and develop a certain passion for, then we are talking about purpose. The determination means that everything is right – for you. That means you do something good for others, you do something good for yourself and you are really good at it – that is your purpose. And to find this determination is, so to speak, your life’s purpose. Your life’s work then is to make that destiny a life’s work. Maybe you make your life’s work your profession and spend a large part of your time on it. You thus create a fulfilling life for yourself and also give something to others. So it’s no wonder that many people are searching for their purpose.

Tricking the brain, to find your destiny

Our brain is structured to think very poorly in the direction we want to go if it doesn’t know that direction yet. This abstract thinking is not so easy for our brain and that’s why it is very difficult to discover something new that you want to have. It is much easier for our brain to think in a deficit way, i.e. to go into the negative. That works with this question or. this creative technique, how to find your purpose. So our brain sometimes has a relatively hard time figuring out what it wants, but it has a very easy time determining what it no longer wants in life. Therefore, my recommendation for you would be to try the following method.

Stop asking yourself what you are meant for or what your goal in life is. Ask yourself rather the question, what your purpose is not. What is not your calling? Don’t ask yourself who you are, but ask yourself who you are not. Ask yourself who or. how you do not want to be.

That is, we just turn all these questions we keep asking ourselves upside down. We do not mentally go where we want to go and try to discover something, but where we do not want to go. What do you not want? Our brain is, as already mentioned, very good at identifying things that bother us. We can use this mechanism to turn this question around.

My key moment

I will give you an example from my life. I studied business administration parallel to my tennis career, so to speak as a plan B, if the tennis career should not work out in the long run. My plan was to use it later to join my father’s tax firm. If it doesn’t work out with tennis, I could have just sat down in the "made nest". With the tennis it went then actually sometime no longer so well and then I sat thus in a lecture hall, in a professional school and studied management economics. Even though I have skills in this area, I got this feeling that this can’t be it. Not because this is a stupid topic, tax consultant is a bad profession etc., but because they were not my issues. I did not want to occupy myself with it the whole day. I thought about what will happen when I’m done. Then I have to listen to this stuff not just 4 hours a day, but 8, 9, 10 hours and deal with it. I don’t really want to do that. Then I thought to myself: "Okay Steffen, this can’t be your future!" What do I actually want? And there I sat now, in a lecture hall. I spent the whole lecture thinking about this question. What do I actually want to do in my life? What is my real profession? Who am I? At the end of the lecture, of course, I did not have the answer. Sure! But I had an answer. I knew that what I had done so far, I did not want in any case. So I got up, drove home and exmatriculated on the same day. So I dropped out of my studies. This was a key moment for me in my life, because I was able to let go of something that takes a lot of my energy.

Steffen kirchner blog

What do you not want?

You know, if you want to find the right way in your life, it is first important to recognize the wrong way and to leave it. The study and the following goals were for me the wrong way. I knew that and that’s why I left this path. Then I went to my father and told him everything. You must know that I have a great father. He then asked me what I wanted to do instead and I said "I don’t know"!" But one thing I knew, "that" I did not want before. It totally freed me up, it was a chaotic moment because I didn’t know what to do next. I didn’t feel good about it right away, but I felt liberated. Leaving the wrong path you define the things you don’t want anymore, frees you from some pain and ballast. IT gives you energy and it protects above all also your energy. You also need this to try out new things again and to throw yourself into the world. With the energy you can test, feel, find out what could be something for you and find your way.

So to make it concrete: If you’re looking for your purpose, just take a piece of paper and write down who you are once you’re not and what you don’t want. Just write down everything you don’t feel like doing. The fascinating thing about life is this: If you take away everything you don’t want, aren’t, and don’t want, you end up with something left over. Namely what you want and are.

Steffen kirchner blog

You just have to start being yourself

This brings us to the core problem of why most people do not even consider this method. You have different beliefs. You were brought up with these: "You are nothing. You have nothing. You can’t do anything, so you have to learn something."This is the wrong belief. Ther misconception that we are nothing, that we must first become someone, is false. We have to work on ourselves, to get somewhere, so that we can be something. That is wrong.

You are a wonderful, great and capable being! Everything you need for a fulfilled, great life is already there. All this is already in you. Only there are so many masks, distractions and beliefs that you don’t see it you feel it. That’s why we believe we have to optimize ourselves all the time to be something. You don’t have to become anything, you already are someone. You just have to start being yourself.

Steffen kirchner blog


You have to realize who you already are and that means: letting go. Cross out everything you are not and don’t want to be. Just go out into the world and try yourself out. Follow your passion, your interests, try yourself and you will see that you will meet great people, you will do things that fulfill you sometimes more and sometimes less and so you will find your way. The most important thing is first of all that you take away everything that is ballast, that is negative, that you are not, that you don’t want and that weighs you down. Become free and find your essence, your center. That is then really you! Then you also have a clear path for your destiny, then you hear again what is actually calling you and what your calling is.

If I can help you to reorganize your inner programs, to dissolve all these beliefs, then look here (link to the seminar from the video). There you will get to a seminar of mine, where we will work exactly on this in two days. I am looking forward to you!

Your Steffen Kirchner

If you want to bring your life to a new level, I offer different seminar events for you. Contents, dates and participants’ comments can be found here.

Here you will also find information about the Steffen Kirchner LIFE CLUB, where you will get daily support from me and my coaches, so that you get into the implementation and not halay through the everyday life comes in between.

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